Asking for help or support

Asking for help or support is one of the hardest things in the world for us proud, self-sufficient, independent people to do. And it often is the crucial step we must take, in order to accomplish one of our goals. Think of a challenge you are facing right now, figure out who you should be asking for help or support, and then contact them. Right now. Which is more important--your ego or accomplishing your goal?

I am not in charge of what the other person does

"Lord give me strength to change the things I can, patience to accept the things I cannot, and wisdom to know the difference"... When I have done all I can, to empower someone else to take a certain action, then the outcome is in their hands, and I can accept whatever happens, even if it hurts me, knowing that I am not responsible for their actions, they are. This removes the stress and leaves me at peace, no matter what happens.

What is fear of failure keeping you from doing?

If you knew you could not fail, what would you attempt? Fear of failure is 100 times worse than failure, because it stops us from pursuing our dreams. What path are you not taking because you are afraid to fail? If you took that path, and you failed, what would failure look like? How does the pain of the failure compare to the joy of success? If the joy of success is better than avoiding the pain of failure, then what are you waiting for?

Why are people so mean to those they love?

Why are people mean to those they love? We all have parts of ourselves that we dislike, & we have value that we can't see. When someone that we respect accidentally or intentionally touches those raw spots by invalidating us, we lash out.

How do I handle that? REACT with anger by attacking or running away, or RESPOND with love, no matter what! Its very hard to keep hurting someone who's giving you nothing but love.

How attractive are you?

If you want to be interesting, be interested. I have found that when I show a keen interest in someone (for example wanting to know who they are, what they do for work and for fun, what they believe in, where they are going in their life, etc), they always end up finding me to be interesting. Isn't that interesting? Who can you attract by being interested in them?

Resentment and Forgiveness

Carrying resentment toward someone is like eating rat poison and then waiting for the other person to die. Resentment doesn't hurt the other person. It hurts me. Forgiveness is the key to happiness. Who are you going to forgive and therefore stop resenting today? How much happiness can you stand?

Focus

Focus... Focussing on at most 3 things at a time is really important. About every 30 days or so, I look at where I am focussing my time and energy and ask myself if these are the right places to be focussing. If not, I make an intentional shift.

What are you focusing your energy and time on right now? Is that consistent with your current short-term and long-term goals? If not, then time to shift your focus to the people and actions that are going to lead to the results that you want in life.

Apologizing

Apologizing costs me nothing. And gains me a lot. So why don't I do it often? Because of my pride. I want to feel like I am right, & apologizing means that I am wrong. Which hurts my pride.

But which is more important? My pride/being right, or having great relationships with people I love? The choice is clear: I shall apologize more often now that I know that it improves relationships and costs me nothing.

Riding the horses you have

We often wish that people in our life would behave better, be more competent, or have a better attitude. And sometimes we can upgrade a person. But usually, the people cannot be replaced, and in order to accomplish our goals in life, we need to find a way to work with them and harness their contribution toward our goals. Riding the horse you have is better than standing still, wishing that you had a better horse.